


Angels Will Fly

by awholenewlevelofcharming



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Car Accidents, Death, Hurt/Comfort, I don't know what to tag this, Injury, M/M, No Smut, OT5, Sad, Sad sad sad, fuuvuvuvuvuvuvuvk, i'm so sorry i did this to you, one direction - Freeform, sigh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-28
Updated: 2014-06-28
Packaged: 2018-02-06 15:07:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1862331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/awholenewlevelofcharming/pseuds/awholenewlevelofcharming
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The lives of Harry and Louis are turned upside down when One Direction gets into an accident.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Angels Will Fly

**Author's Note:**

> **Warnings** : There are mentions of death, injury and graphic(ish) detail of how the injuries occur.
> 
> Hello! I've been writing this for weeks, I don't know how I feel about it. However, I'm pretty excited to share it with you guys! Please let me know what you think and I hope you enjoy!
> 
> Happy reading! 
> 
> (Please don't hate me)

It happened all so fast. 

The boys were supposed to be in a meeting with the one and only Simon Cowell, but Louis just _had_ to have coffee so they were five minutes late. 

It happened way too fast for Harry. 

_ONE DIRECTION BOYS IN CRITICAL CONDITION AFTER ACCIDENT, posted three months ago._

_ONE DIRECTION: LIAM PAYNE AND ZAYN MALIK TO BE TAKEN INTO SURGERY, UPDATE SOON, posted three months ago._

_ONE DIRECTION: HARRY STYLES (TOMLINSON) SAID TO BE UP AND AWAKE AFTER CRITICAL SURGERY, posted three months ago._

_ONE DIRECTION: LOUIS TOMLINSON TO BE TAKEN INTO SURGERY, posted three months ago._

And finally, Harry quickly exits out of the article. Heart dropping to his stomach, he throws his iPhone at the wall. 

_ONE DIRECTION: NIALL HORAN DEAD ON SCENE, posted three months ago._

♡♡♡♡♡♡

"What about the word _Zap_ , with an exclaimation mark? Y'know, like in comic books?"

Louis looks up from his book, glasses hanging low on his nose. He doesn't usually wear them, doesn't really need to, although they help him focus for some odd reason. 

Zayn exhales a puff of smoke. "Or is that too weird?" He asks once Louis doesn't answer him. 

"No, 'course not." Louis closes his book once he finds his bookmark, and makes grabby hands at the joint between Zayn's fingers. 

"Harry will kill you." Zayn smirks, but hands Louis the joint anyway, watching curiously as Louis inhales deeply. "He's definitely going to kill me."

"He'll get over it," Is Louis' reply. Because, well. He will. Louis is kind of mad at Harry right now, but he figures he'll get over it, too. "Anyway, back to matching tattoos. Zap. Exclaimation mark."

"Right." Zayn rolls his chocolate brown eyes, the white around it a bright red because - Well. Weed. "We could get a different one, I just - I dunno. I want a new one soon. Next stop is Texas, and Pez says that they have great artists there."

Louis nods, Perrie is never wrong. 

Louis and Zayn planned on getting matching tattoos - much to Harry's annoyance - very soon. Just to show that they really are best mates, and all that. Plus, tattoos are like, really cool.

"Okay. Yeah." Louis finally agrees, handing the joint back to Zayn. "I like that." 

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

Louis smiles at Zayn, enjoying the quiet that surrounds their hotel room. Harry agreed that they needed a night to cool off from one another and Harry agreed to share a room with Niall because Liam always had to have a room by himself. 

"Wanna tell me why Haz and you are fighting?"

Louis screws his eyes shut in annoyance. Because _no_ he doesn't want to talk about it. "It's stupid, don't worry about it." He manages to get out between gritted teeth. 

Zayn doesn't say anything, simply lights the joint again and inhales. He looks peaceful and completely unstressed (which, why?) or maybe Louis is just exhausted. "Did he say no?"

And. 

Fuck. 

Fuck Zayn. Seriously.

"I haven't - We haven't - _No._ "

Zayn grins. The bastard. "Why not?"

"I can't just ask him to marry me in some city we have no idea of?" 

"Oh come on," Zayn chuckles, rolling his eyes. "Propose to him in every city, you know he'd love that."

Louis cackles loud at that, actually. He cannot imagine proposing in _every single city_. "That would be mental."

"True," Zayn smirks. "Fine. In every country."

"No!" Louis giggles, the weed finally circulating into his veins. The two boys are quiet for awhile, Louis snuggling into his duvet as Zayn lounges on the bed next to his own. Louis frowns. "He's mad at me because I don't want kids."

"I thought - _Louis_."

"What?" Louis frowns and groans into his palm. Great. "It's just - I mean. Not yet."

"Oh shut up," Zayn throws a pillow at him, which. 

Again. Fuck Zayn. 

"I mean. I want kids, yeah. Especially with Haz, but, like, I don't - I just -"

"You're not ready?"

"No, no," Louis sighs, he doesn't even know what he's trying to say. "I'm just a bit scared to be honest."

"You'll be a great father and husband, Louis."

Louis waits a few beats before finally looking at Zayn, surprised that the darker boy is staring at him with a serious look on his face. It's sincere and warm - And. Louis smiles at him a little. "Thank you, Zayn."

Zayn simply grins and hands him the joint again. "Let's get really high and watch shitty telly, yeah? Like old times but we'll make new memories."

"Like old times but we'll make new memories." Louis echoes. It feels like a promise. 

♡♡♡♡♡♡

Harry feels like he's on fire. 

His whole body is screaming at him to stop whatever the fuck is happening because seriously? What the bloody hell is happening?

He remembers when he was seven, he broke his arm pretty badly and the pain was so bad that Harry blacked out. 

All Harry sees is black, although he can hear the frantic voices of his mother, sister and father and his body _is aching_. 

It's like his arm back when he was seven again, however, it's _all over_. 

His body is broken. 

He surprises himself when he hears himself scream, throat tightening around itself and cracking uncomfortably so. It's loud and bone-chilling even to his own ears and he feels hands pushing his chest down which, confuses him. 

Where is he? Where was Louis? Where were the other boys? What happened? Why was his family there?

When he finally manages to spring his eyes open, he wishes he hadn't. The light is blinding, causing him to wince back into - is this a bed? - whatever he was on. They flutter closed again once he suddenly feels peaceful.

His body isn't on fire anymore. 

♡♡♡♡♡♡

"You aren't seriously thinking about it, are you?" Liam raises his eyebrows, although the lines on his forehead make Harry smile a little. 

"I haven't talked to Louis about it, but. I definitely want a surrogate." 

Harry watched as Liam processed this news, his mouth screwing up into a stubborn tight line. "Have you talked to Simon about it? You don't even know how the fans will take it." 

Harry sighs. Liam had a point. But then again, "They took Louis and I coming out as _fianceè's_ well enough."

Liam chuckles, quiet and soft throughout the safety of their tour bus. "Very true."

"He wants to adopt."

Liam's smile disappears slowly, instead he sighs quietly and shakes his head. "I just don't understand why you guys want kids so bad this early into your relationship. And we're going to be on the road _a lot_ , do you really think it's a good idea -?"

"Just." Harry puts up a hand to stop Liam's speech. He's had enough of those, thank you very much, Mother Liam. "Stop. Okay? I know, trust me. I know. But - But this is what I want. With Louis. I want this with Louis."

"I know," Liam murmurs, placing a hand on his thigh and giving it a gentle squeeze. "You know I'm always on your side, okay?" 

It's quiet for a moment and Harry enjoys the sound of the big bus moving, smiles as he hears Niall's loud snores from his bunk, Zayn's soft murmuring across the buses room and Louis's loud cackle at something on his phone. 

"Thank you." Harry whispers, moving to put his laptop on the ground and scooting over to place his head on Liam's shoulder. "You know, for everything you've done for me."

And that - That had been a lot.

Liam stuck up for him and Louis all the time, gave him cuddles when Louis couldn't, listened to his pointless stories and even joked around with him all the time. Liam was probably his favorite - Don't tell the lads that though. 

"No problem." Liam grins. "Best mate and all, I've got to, don't I?"

Harry hugs him tight that night, stomach in knots when he thinks about telling Louis his plan for their future kids.

♡♡♡♡♡♡

When Harry wakes up again, it's to the sound of his mum, Anne's, voice. 

"Mum?" Woah. His voice is destroyed - He doesn't sound like himself at all. His voice sounds like it does after concerts, but 1000 times worse. It's scratchy and sounds like he's talking through a thin straw. 

"Harry baby," Once he hears the strain in her voice, he opens his eyes slowly, forever thankful that it's dark. "Harry, oh my god, Harry."

"Mum, what - What happened?"

Anne chokes a little, her eyes puffy and red-rimmed. "Oh baby."

"Mum." Harry demands. "Where is Louis and Jake? What happened?"

"You were in an accident," She finally croaks softly. "A, uh, a drunk driver hit you all three nights ago. You've been in and put of consciousness for days... Um, Louis was driving -"

Harry's breath catches in his throat, causing him to choke on his own spit. It hurts, everything hurts again. He can't move his head to look at himself, to see if he's lost any limbs or if he's all bandaged up or -

He hadn't realized he started hyperventilating until he heard his heart monitor start to beep crazily. Anne places a hand on what Harry assumes is his arm - He can't really feel it right now, so he's not 100 percent sure - Oh god, what if he lost an arm? What if he lost feeling in his arm? 

Where is Louis? Or Liam? Zayn? Niall? Jake? What the fuck is happening? Where is everybody? 

"Louis is okay. Jake is with Great-Nan, he's worried about you. He needs daddy's to come home safely." Anne whispers, suddenly, and then she's crying again and Harry breathes out a little easier. Louis is okay. Jake is okay.

But. 

"What about the lads?" Harry demands, keeping his eyes trained on her face. She was an open book, that's where he got it from. She starts sobbing again, grabs his hand (thank god he feels that) and squeezes. Her head falls against his chest - And Harry's about to ask again, until he realizes - _Oh._

Oh. Oh no. No, no, no, _no_.

"Mum," Harry's voice cracks, he's almost certain this is somebody elses voice. "Mum tell me what happened."

"Niall is dead, Harry." 

She says it so quietly, that Harry thinks he's imagined it. 

He's about to ask how, about to demand her to tell him more, but the sudden urge to sleep is weighing down on his shoulders. 

He tries to fight it off, blinks rapidly and forces himself to stay awake and manages to get out an, "Mum. Tell me h-" before he's passed out, black surrounding his eyelids. 

It's the only full real hours of sleep he'll get for months.

♡♡♡♡♡♡

When he wakes again, Louis is there. 

He has a cast on his leg and a frown on his lips as he sits down next to the curly haired boy, jaw set as he explains with full detail on what happened. "It's my fault."

"No." Harry argues, he _knows_ it isn't. He remembers everything now, the vivid memory of how everything happened.

"Liam didn't make it." Louis whispers, his eyebrows are dipped together, tears forming in his once-bright blue eyes. 

Harry's chest tightens, throat closing in and causing him to let out an unattractive noise. His body feels heavy. 

He feels hopeless, feels so sick and _so, so tired_. Louis grabs his hand and cries into his neck, repeatedly apologizing until he's a blubbering mess. 

He cries with Louis until he passes out again, still unaware of his injuries. 

♡♡♡♡♡♡

"Bloody hell, Niall!" Louis exclaims from Harry's lap, both of them watching as the blonde stuffs his face disgustingly with his burrito. "Calm down, will ya?!"

Niall chuckles around a mouthful of meat, rolling his eyes. "I'm starving, a'right?" 

They're somewhere in California and they just ended a show. It was so bloody fantastic, the fans always seem to surprise Harry with how loud they can be. They hadn't eaten before the show, so they stopped at a Taco Bell and Niall quite literally sucked in all the food at once. 

Harry wasn't that hungry yet, figures maybe he'll just go to sleep already like Zayn and Liam had, exhausted from tonight's show - But Louis had sat on his lap, legs tangled together as he scooted further up his thighs. 

Louis plays with a curl on Harry's head. "Have you decided which girl yet?" 

And. No. He hadn't. 

They had three girls' pictures and bios from their surrogate lawyer, all promising they'd deliever full term and sign the contracts Louis and Harry had made one night a few weeks ago. 

Niall gets up from where he's sitting on the bus, walks over to the table and spreads the pictures out. Harry shakes his head to answer Louis' question, moves the smaller boy off of him and drops down go his knees to look with Niall.

There's a blonde girl named Jessica, a brunette with curly hair named Eleanor and a girl with colored hair (pink - seriously?) named Ashley. 

It was pretty much a tie between Jessica and Eleanor, so he pulled the picture of Ashley down and away from the table. Niall wrapped an arm around Harry's showers. "This one," He points to a picture of Eleanor. "Is proper fit."

"She's going to be carrying _our_ child Niall, don't even think about -" Louis is glaring, voice stern as he points a finger in his face but all Niall does is cackle, head thrown back as he laughs loud and bright. 

"Don't worry," Niall rolls his eyes. "I'm just saying. You want'ta baby to look like yeh, yeah?"

"Definetely."

"Eleanor has curly hair. Haz here has curly hair. Chances are, the baby will have curly hair." Niall raises his eyebrows like it's obvious. 

"Well," Louis looks at Harry, considering. "I was going to be the one to, uh, you know. Spread the seed, or, you know, whatever they call it."

"Oh."

Niall shrugs and Harry sighs quietly. "There's still a chance." 

"I suppose." Niall hums thoughtfully, and then points to the picture of Jessica. "Well, she has blonde hair and green eyes. Would you rather have a baby with blue eyes and brown hair or a baby with blonde hair and green or blue eyes?"

Harry slumps forward, sighing louder. He had no idea what he wants. He didn't realize choosing a surrogate would be this hard, but when Louis wraps a leg around his waist from where he sits above him, he immediately relaxes. "I just don't know."

It's quiet for awhile as Harry lets his eyes fall between the two girls, both are really pretty and seem very smart. And it just - It's so hard. Niall finally speaks up. "Choose Eleanor."

Harry perks up at that, eyes meeting Niall's own. "Yeah?"

He places a hand on Harry's knees, grinning. "Am I ever wrong?"

Harry chuckles at that, leaning forward to give him a hug. "Never."

Louis makes a noise and Harry pulls away to look up at him. "What do you think, Lou?"

And really, it was all up to Harry. Louis didn't really care because he trusted Harry to make the right decision, but also because he just wanted a kid already. They agreed that Harry would choose as long as Louis was the one who gave the seed - after laughing about how they could probably sell it for millions of dollars - and that was that. 

Louis looks down at Eleanor's picture, grabbing it and turning it over to read her bio again. 

_Name_ : Eleanor Calder  
 _Age_ : 23  
 _Graduated under King's College, has one child of her own and does not smoke, drink or do any drugs._  
 _Characteristics_ : Outgoing, very artistic (a painter and writer), charming, smart and funny. 

Louis stops there, looking back up and realizes that Harry and Niall are staring at him as he reads it. He smiles down at his fiancèe and leans over to kiss him on the lips. "Eleanor it is, then."

"Yes!" Niall barks out, loud and in Harry's ear. Harry laughs and wraps his arms tightly around Niall's waist. "Yeh will thank me later for helping you!" He says between giggles. 

Louis laughs when Harry and Niall fall over, both red in the face from laughing happily - Maybe just excited that _they're finally going to have a kid_ and Louis soon joins in on the other side, making Niall squished in the middle. 

After nearly suffocating and gasping for air, they finally loosen their grip and listen to the sound of all of their breathing quiet down. Niall suddenly grins, "I can't wait to have a mini you running around."

Louis grins and Harry pokes Niall's side as he cuddles into him, hand on Louis' own on Niall's stomach. "It's going to be bloody fantastic."

They're quiet again, for a moment, before Niall says, "I get to be Uncle Ni, right?"

"Of course." Harry answers right away. "Uncle Niall. I like that."

"Me too," Louis and Niall say at the same time. 

The three of them erupt in a fit of giggles.

They're more than happy. They're blissful. 

♡♡♡♡♡♡

Harry's throat feels like it's ripped in half. 

It's dry and he's _so, so thirsty_ and he feels like the Worlds Fattest Man is sitting on him because everything just feels heavy. 

Suddenly, his mind is kicking into action, aware of everything around him. The sound of a heart monitor by his ear, the soft hum of all the machines around him, the quiet buzz from the telly across the room and the snores coming from Louis. 

He makes a noise in the back of his throat, not trusting his voice as he slowly lifts his eyes open. They feel like they weigh a hundred pounds, thankfully it's dark and the small light doesn't irritate him as much as it did before. 

The snores seem to stop just as Harry makes another noise, trying to clear his throat. It's foggy and gross and everything tastes like metallic. "Haz? Harry, love, are you awake?"

Louis sounds horrible. 

His voice is wrecked, heavy and dry as if he'd been crying for hours. Louis doesn't need to tell Harry, because Harry already _knows_. 

Everything hits him at once. 

Niall, Liam and Zayn are dead. 

He didn't mean to, he honestly didn't even know how it came out of him. He didn't mean to start frantically screaming, thrashing against the harness that holds him to the hospital bed. 

The next thing he remembers is, is two scrawny arms are holding him down as Louis calls for a nurse, watches as Louis' whole face screws up in something like fear and watches as two male nurses run in and nudge Louis off him. 

The next thing he sees is, is Louis dropping to the ground as a cry escapes his lips, black surrounding and taking over his eyelids. 

♡♡♡♡♡♡

Louis wakes up to a loud shrill of a ringtone and after listening to it for another moment, he realizes it's Harry's phone. 

He nudges the younger boy awake, anything to _make the bloody thing stop_ and Harry immediately jolts up from their bed. 

They're on Christmas break, which is three months off, but hell, it sure was nice just to have some alone time with Harry.

When the sound doesn't stop, Louis huffs loudly, rolling over and sitting up quickly - He was all ready to yell at Harry, but it dies in his throat when he sees the curly-haired boy simply just staring at his phone with his eyes wide. "Harry?"

Harry doesn't answer and continues to stare at his phone until the ringing dies, the silence filling their room, and Louis raises his eyebrows. "Harry, who was that?"

"Eleanor's sister."

"Harry!" Louis yells, quickly grabbing the phone out of Harry's hand and redialing the number. "What is the matter with you?"

Louis listens to the dial tone for a moment, eyebrows raising at Harry in disbelief, seriously? What is the matter? Like, Eleanor could be in trouble, it was their duty to make sure she was okay at all times. Harry continues to sit in shock before he finally rolls out of bed, causing Louis to let out a gush of surprised air. "What the -?"

"Hello?" Eleanor's sister, Eva, sounds frantic.

Louis immediately jumps up. "Eva. What's wrong?"

"I'm so sorry for calling so late, Louis. But - But Eleanor - She -"

Louis grabs the jeans that Harry throws at him, acutely amazed that Harry is already dressed and grabbing his wallet and keys, he holds the phone between his shoulder and ear as he struggles to pull on his jeans. Can his arse like, not, right now? "Eva."

"I don't know, she said she was in pain so I rushed her to the hospital - It's - Louis, it's too early for her to go into labor."

Louis's mum is a nurse, so he kind of figures that if she goes into labor tonight, the baby will be a premature one. Although, Eleanor's due date isn't for another month - So, it can't be _horrible_ , he huffs out when Harry throws him his TOMS. "What hospital are you at?"

"London Bridge." Eva answers and Louis mutters his 'we'll be right there' and ignores Eva's apologies. Louis slips on his shoes and throws on a beanie, hoping that fans won't be a problem tonight. He follows as Harry runs out of the flat and into his range rover, and immediately buckles himself in as Harry begins to drive out and into the busy streets.

"Is Eleanor okay?"

Louis finally manages to look at Harry, who well, looks like shit.

His eyes are wild, curls askew and knuckles white on the steering wheel and Louis bites the inside of his cheek before placing a hand on Harry's knee. "Hey," He whispers, watching as Harry's tense shoulders fall. "She's okay. Everything will be okay."

"Louis," Harry begins to say, but Louis shushes him, leaning over the compartment and kissing the side of Harry's face. Harry finally lets go of the wheel and grabs Louis' hand, tangling their fingers together and breathing heavily as he gets closer to the hospital. 

"Everything will be okay."

Louis doesn't know whether or not he's reassuring Harry or himself more.

♡♡♡♡♡♡

A baby boy is born a month early.

He's tiny and his hair sticks up when Louis holds him, but he's one of the most beautifulest creatures Louis or Harry's ever seen. Eleanor fell asleep a few moments after she got to hold him for awhile, grinning and crying as Harry is a sobbing mess profusely thanking her and just being _so embarrassing_ and Eva went back to their home to get clothes for Eleanor when she awakes, so it's nice and quiet for the three boys.

The Tomlinson Family. Louis grins when he thinks that, tears forming in his eyes when the boy shifts in his arms. "He's so precious," He whispers quietly as Harry's runs a cautious finger down his cheek. 

"Jake." Harry murmurs, suddenly.

"Jake?"

"His name." Harry bites his lip. "Jake. What do you think?"

"I love it." Louis whispers down at the curly-haired boy, and he grins back up at him, tears in his eyes as he reaches up to kiss Louis on the mouth. It's soft and quick, sticky from all of the tears (happy ones) and Harry pulls away to stare at Louis and his new family with a new certain type of fondness in his eyes.

"Welcome to the world, Jake Tomlinson-Styles."

♡♡♡♡♡♡

Harry gets released from the hospital a few days after the last freak out.

He had a broken rib that punctured some of his heart, a broken arm and a broken leg and a broken collarbone that made him have to wear a neck brace. It was pretty horrible and the pain was even worse, but everything was worse now.

He felt like he was in a different body, like he was floating in a dream - or really, a nightmare - but when he exited out of the hospital, he really wasn't expecting flashes from cameras and people shouting at him and screaming of panic to surround him. Louis limped on crutches beside him, Harry being wheeled out by Paul, their security guard. Harry ignores the sounds of cries and all the questions that are being shoved down his throat, a little annoyed that people can't respect their privacy especially after something this horrific. 

When Paul finally manages to get them in the car, he starts to drive away and tells them quietly, "You have to give them the story on what happened."

When Louis doesn't say anything, simply stares out the window, Harry swallows and nods. He did remember everything after all. "I will."

It's quiet for almost an hour, the soft hum from the radio and Harry thinks he's going crazy. He blocks out the mental images of everything, tries to block out what just happened, but Louis grabs his hand and looks him in the eyes, tears are already forming before Louis says, "I'm coming with."

"You won't be able to handle it." Harry whispers. "I'll do this alone, it's okay."

"Harry -"

"Louis." Harry whispers quietly, eyes closing and swallowing thickly as he pushes away a sob that is threatening to break free. "It's okay."

"I'm sorry." Louis's voice breaks as he drops his head on Harry's shoulder, tears finally breaking free and soaking up Harry's shirt. "I'm so sorry."

Harry wraps his non-casted arm around Louis, kissing the back of his head and running his fingers through his fringe.

"I'm so sorry, too, Louis."

♡♡♡♡♡♡

"I'm sorry that we're making you do this," A guy with a beard says to Harry as Harry begins to sit down. "I know it's very soon but we need to know what happened in order to make this a case."

Harry nods, he understands, he knows he has to be the brave one because Louis isn't in the right state of mind. The guilt is on Louis and Harry was strong enough to be the stronger one out of the two. "As long as you answer my question first."

"Of course." The guy with beady eyes says - Harry doesn't want his sympathy.

"Where is Jake?"

"He's with your mum." He smiles. "Anne should be here."

Harry didn't know that. He hadn't had his phone and he hasn't seen Anne since the last time he saw her at the hospital - Which, was weird. But he figures she kept a safe distance because of Jake. "Okay." He folds his hands (well fingers) on top of the table, biting on the inside of his cheek.

"Do you want to explain what happened?"

"Sure." Harry clears his throat, feeling like it might split in half if he talks anymore. "Well we had a meeting with Simon about our tour that we were supposed to go on-" He swallows back a sob. "And uh, anyway. Louis wanted some coffee, because it was early and N- Uh, Niall... He uh, wanted -" He can't breathe all of a sudden, he thought he could do this.

"Take your time."

And no. He didn't want to take his time. He wanted this over with so he could properly grieve with his husband and family. He wanted this over with because he didn't want to think about it anymore. He didn't want to feel anything anymore. "Uh." He swallows again. "Anyway, he didn't have his seatbelt on, he um, he took it off so he could change the station on the radio. Um, it's a bit foggy after that... I just remember Louis had to make this turn or else we wouldn't of made it to the coffee shop, and then we were hit and uh-"

Vivid memories start to flood his head, the image of Niall flying out the window and Liam hitting his head against the window and causing it to shatter. The image of Louis falling forward and hitting the steering wheel, the vivid image of Zayn slamming forward and his whole body flying against the windowsill. He shivers, tears swimming in his eyes. He can't talk suddenly, throat closing up and causing him to choke.

He didn't realize he started sobbing, until he felt a hand on his shoulder.

He didn't realize he lost almost everything in a split second.

♡♡♡♡♡♡

"I brought booze!" Is the first thing Niall says when Louis opens the door to his flat. He chuckles when Niall lets himself in.

They were having a 'lads night' as Niall called it, with all of One Direction because it was well needed what with having a month away from each other. Zayn and Liam were already in the flat somewhere with Harry and Anne had came and took Jake away a few hours ago. It was perfect really, just like old times.

Niall kicks off his shoes at the door and hangs his coat on the hook by the hallway table and Louis follows him to their entertainment room where he figures everyone else will be. They are, Louis figures, because all of the blankets from his bed and the guest room are missing and are on the floor as he enters the large room.

He sees that Zayn, Liam and Harry are already cuddling into the blankets and lets out a loud chuckle when he sees that Harry has a bowl of popcorn, candy, alcohol and soda on the table. "What movie are we watching?"

"Love Actually -"

"No." Four boys chorus towards Harry, because it was his suggestion. They all laugh because that was weird, and Louis makes his way to the pallet that they have and claims his corner above Harry and next to Zayn. 

"What about The Avengers?" Liam suggests, and it isn't a _horrible_ suggestion. 

"Maybe."

"We have all night." Zayn says, finally looking up from his phone and popping an M&M in his mouth. "We could watch five movies for all I care."

Liam groans. "No we can't. We have a meeting tomorrow early in the morning, remember?"

The room is suddenly filled with a chorus of grunts and groans, causing all of them to laugh again. Louis grins as this all sounds familiar. "Remember when we were in The X Factor? We had this same problem."

Harry grins. "Well _we_ didn't, all we did is snog anyway -"

"Oh god," Niall chuckles through a groan. "I remember that."

"Oh my gosh, so do I." Zayn laughs. "I remember thinking that I regretted ever saying yes to joining One Direction."

"Glad you did." Liam says as he wraps an arm around Zayn's shoulder, which causes Zayn to snuggle into him. "It's crazy, innit?"

"What is?" Harry asks quietly from where he has his head in Louis' lap, practically purring as Louis cards his fingers through his messy curls.

"How the five of us just - Fit together so well.." Liam tries to explain, although he can't, but the boys know what he's trying to say, they all smile warmly at each other and Niall finally lets out a loud breath, scooting over so they were all sandwiched together. 

"I love you guys." Niall says, and they all chorus their 'i love you's' back and then erupt into a fit of giggles when Louis squirms free and tells them to, "Fuck off, when did we become such pussies?"

That night, they don't untangle from each other. All cuddling into an awkward group.

It's the last night that Harry or Louis will have this.

♡♡♡♡♡♡

Harry wakes up to a tug of a curl. "Lou." He groans, rolling his face into a pillow. "C'mon, go back to sleep."

Two years after the accident, Louis and Harry finally managed to somewhat get back to normal. Well, as normal as normal gets. The fans have been incredibly supportive, paps don't really follow them around anymore and they managed to keep their life somewhat private. He feels a tug again and he huffs, rolling on his back and opening his eyes only to be met with dark blue ones - Ones that were not Louis'. "Daddy -"

The sound of Jake's voice causes Harry to immediately sit up and pull him into his lap, eyes widening once he realizes that Jake is crying. "What's the matter, sweetie?"

"Papa -" Hiccup. "Papa is throwing things, he woke m'up." His bottom lip begins to quiver, and Harry mentally curses everything. Louis hasn't had a anxiety/panic attack in _months_ , why now? 

"Okay baby," Harry kisses the top of his forehead. "Go back to your room and shut the door, okay? Turn on the telly, I'll let you stay up and watch 'toons for a little bit, okay?"

Jake nods happily and Harry quickly wipes the tears from his cheeks and carefully places him on the ground before getting up himself, sighing heavily and running a hand through his hair. He's dressed only in his boxers, but he doesn't care. Louis needs him, especially now. 

He cautiously walks out into the hallway and already hears the sound of Louis sniffling, the ragged breath and the loud noises of things being shifted around. His feet stick to the floor - they should really mop - which causes him to be louder than he wants to be. He looks slowly around the kitchen before he finally meets blue eyes, red rimmed and puffy as the man continues to cry. "Louis." Harry whispers quietly. "You're scaring Jake, what's the matter?"

Louis gasps for air when another sob racks through his body, and Harry's heart tugs as he walks over to the smaller lad, sitting down clumsily next to him. Louis is quick to fall in Harry's embrace, tears soaking into Harry's bare skin. "I - I -"

Harry knows what Louis is going to say, simply squeezes him tighter and shushes him, whispering, "It isn't your fault baby," His lips brush Louis' forehead and he shivers underneath Harry's arms, crying softer as Harry scratches the back of his neck. "None of it is your fault."

"I can't -" Louis gets out through gritted teeth. "I'm a coward -"

"Hey."

"I'm a fucking coward, Harry!"

"Louis." Harry snaps sternly, pulling away just enough to grab Louis' chin to force him to look at the green-eyed boy. "You listen to me alright?"

When Louis nods, eyes drowning in tears, Harry finally speaks again. "You did nothing wrong -"

"What the bloody hell do you mean? I killed -"

"You didn't kill anyone." Harry says for what feels like the millionth time. It was true, Louis hadn't. Although, Louis has a hard time believing him. "The driver was drunk and you weren't. He killed them. You were simply turning and he hit us -"

He did lose his best mates too, after all.

Harry swallows hard and puts on his brave face for Louis, eyebrows knitting together when Louis lets out another sob. "I didn't even go -" Hiccup. "I didn't even go to the funeral. I hate myself s - so much."

"Shh," Harry hums, pulling Louis close and running his hands through his fringe. "Shh baby, it's okay. They would've understood."

Louis wipes his nose with his sleeve, eyes swollen from rubbing them so much. Harry bites his lip when he pushes back Louis' hair. "I- I just wanted some ice cream. B-but Ni - Niall's favorite is in there. I - I can't -"

Harry raises his eyebrows a little, because he was sure that he had gotten rid of that. He rubs Louis' back, tasting blood once he realizes that he'd bitten his lip harder than before. "We'll throw that away, okay?"

Louis swallows hard. "I think that's okay."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

It's quiet again and Harry kisses Louis' temple, fighting back the urge to cry himself. He had gone into depression for awhile until he realized that boys wouldn't of approved of that.

He had to be strong for everyone. 

It got pretty exhausting after awhile.

"I'll throw it away, okay?" Harry whispers quietly, hand scratching down Louis' back. "Clean yourself up and go tuck Jake in for bed, okay? He's scared."

"I'm sorry, Harry." Louis says thickly. "I didn't mean to wake you lot up."

"Listen," Harry whispers, standing to pull out their medicine box. He pulls out Louis's anxiety medication - He had to start taking it a few months after the accident, because he started doing things he wouldn't of done if it hadn't of happened. Harry placed one pill in his palm. "You wake me up next time, okay?"

"I know." Louis says quietly after he throws the pill back. "I didn't realize I was about to have an attack."

Harry hums thoughtfully. "Just please -"

"I promise." Louis unfolds his legs and stands so he can wrap his arms around Harry's waist. "I love you."

"I love you," Harry whispers into Louis' hair, tightening his grip. "So much."

Louis pulls away to look up at that taller boy, standing on his toes and pecking him on the lips twice before pulling away and walking to their sons room. 

Harry watches for a moment, smiles back quickly when Louis turns around at the door and gives him a smile. When the door shuts however, the smile leaves his face just as quickly as it came on. 

He slowly turns back to the freezer, and pulls out the tub of ice cream. It was, in fact, Niall's favorite - It _was_ Niall's tub of ice cream. His bottom lip begins to quiver as he opens the tub, scooping out the last bits of it and pouring it down the sink. 

He doesn't realize he starts crying until he feels himself unable to breathe, quickly raises his hands to his eyes and bats away the wetness. 

Crying over a tub of ice cream.

Harry bangs his head against the cabinet above him lightly, eyes shutting tightly. "I miss you guys so much." 

He quickly wipes his eyes again and throws the tub into the bin without thinking twice, and heads to Jakes room. 

He takes a deep breath before opening the door and a small smile forms on his lips once he sees Louis and Jake cuddled up and already asleep. 

He crawls in a few seconds later, holding his favorite boys for the night. 

♡♡♡♡♡

"I'm taking Jake out to the park."

Harry looks up from the boxes he pulled out of the attic a few hours earlier, in desperate need to distract himself. Today was particularly bad. 

"Okay." Harry nods, understanding. Louis walks over and kisses Harry quickly before Jake comes padding out in khaki shorts that are so big on him that Harry lets out a little giggle. "Like father like son."

"Oi." Louis snaps, although he's smiling. He grabs Jakes hand and Jake waves at Harry shouting that he's ready to go. "We'll be back."

"Be careful." 

Louis smiles tightly and nods, closes the door behind him and Harry stares for a moment. He shakes himself back to reality, looking back down at the boxes. 

This box is filled with Harry and Louis' stuff from the wedding, pictures and gifts and stuff like that. Harry pulls out a CD that's labeled " _Speech from the boys_." And well. 

He was desperate to _hear_ the voices of his best friends again, listening to their albums was getting a little annoying, so he grabs his laptop and pops the CD in, swallowing hard when the opening scene rolls on. 

Liam and Zayn are standing in tuxes somewhere behind the place they had their wedding at, Niall's behind the camera - Harry knows because he recognizes Niall's laugh - and Liam's voice fills the silence of Harry's living room. "You rolling?"

"Yup!" Niall says. "Action!" 

"Hi, Lou and Haz!" Zayn and Liam say in chorus. Liam is grinning at the camera and Zayn has that pouty look he does when a camera is in his face, and Harry laughs, tears forming in his eyes. "We just wanted to make a quick little video to say congratulations."

Zayn smiles now, waving. "We're just proud of you and so happy for you. Also, we can't wait to see baby Tommo." 

Liam walks closer to the camera and Zayn follows as Niall turns it around so it's on his face. "We love you! Best mates in the whole world. So lucky to know you. And I'm honored to be the best man."

"Hey!" Liam glares at the blonde. "So are Zayn and I?!"

"Yeah but I'm the best." Niall chuckles. "And we all love each other equally."

"Awwww," Zayn says and grins when Liam slaps him across the arm. "Sap."

"Oh shut up." Liam argues. "You were crying at the wedding -"

The camera drops then, Niall bending over and cackling. Harry only sees the camera moving and zooming into the grass before he hears Niall curse, zooming back out and pushing it back up and showing the three of their faces again. "Congratulations!" They say again, grinning. And Niall waves at the camera. "I can't wait to spend the rest of m'life with yeh!" 

It _sounded_ like a promise.

**Author's Note:**

> If there are any mistakes, I'm sorry. I will fix them asap.
> 
> If you want to yell at me, or want to follow me, or want to ask me questions - follow my [tumblr](http://wemetinthetoilets.tumblr.com).


End file.
